


angel's light that burns

by thesorrowoflizards



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Abrupt Ending, Alec cries, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending, Episode: s02e10 By the Light of Dawn, Heavy Angst, M/M, Magnus was still in the institute when the sword went off, Major Character Death.... Or Is It?, Not Really Character Death, Parabatai Bond, Soul Sword Massacre, but magnus lives so it's all good bros!!!, it's sad, like "alec clutching magnus's 'dead' body" angst, lol jk y'all know i can't write that shit, lowkey bamf magnus, magnus nearly dies, minor amounts of Insecure Magnus, mostly focused on malec, sorry - Freeform, sorry lol, when i say abrupt ending i really mean it, wrote this ages ago but never finished, wrote this before i decided that i just couldn't stand jace anymore so...
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-02
Updated: 2019-02-02
Packaged: 2019-10-20 20:10:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,046
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17628881
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thesorrowoflizards/pseuds/thesorrowoflizards
Summary: Magnus didn't make it out in time.Alec finds him.





	angel's light that burns

**Author's Note:**

> im posting this bc i have the self awareness to admit i'll never finish it properly so. enjoy this abrupt little oneshot

 

 

Magnus stumbled forward, Madzie still safely wrapped in his arms.

He ran.

He had to get outside, get Madzie to safety.

His wards were down- and new wards, enhanced by one of Valentine’s experiments, no doubt- were in their place. He couldn’t portal out.

Madzie curled closer into his arms. The poor girl was clearly scared, even though she wasn’t showing it.

He rounded the corner. He recognized the corridor- he was near the exit, he was almost there—

Circle members spilled out from the other end of the hallway, armed with their glowing, biting swords, and cruel smiles that were just as sharp.

They circled him without a word.

Magnus set Madzie down. “Run, sweetheart,” he said quietly. “The second I you can, _run._ They’ve raised heavy wards that have cut off portals, so don’t try, okay?”

“Enough talking,” one of the foot soldiers hissed, and several launched forward at once.

Magnus lashed out with his magic, hands blazing crimson and whirling around him. He punched and cast hexes, pulled every move he knew—in both hand-to-hand combat and battle magic—but he was running out of energy.

He kept Madzie safe, making sure to shield her even when it began to drain him faster.

She got away.

Magnus didn’t.

 

He was left standing, albeit barely, over the piled-up bodies of unconscious Circle members. He’d barely bested them thanks to how stupidly outnumbered he was, and now he was bruised and bloodied, but alive.

He didn’t have much time—he ran towards the exit, hoping to get away, get to Catarina or Madzie or—

A terrible light filled the hall, spilling from every crack and opening from deep within the Institute.

Before Magnus could even react it was surrounding him, and he was crying out in pain—

It _burned._

Magnus collapsed to the floor as the pain built in his head, his limbs aching and heavy and his very blood boiling with heat, scorched from the inside out—

He felt dizzy, and whatever noise he had been making—a scream, a cry of his lover’s name?—stopped.

He parted his lips silently, trying to say something, anything—and the burning pain took over and his vision swam and went fuzzy and then

everything

went

black.

 

 

* * *

 

 

_There._

Alec’s hands were shaking. Hell, his whole body was shaking.

There was a motionless figure slumped on the floor, a figure in a familiar dark suit.

_No. No. No, please no._

Maybe it was someone else. How many times already had Alec caught sight of dull yellow eyes (a young warlock woman, pale and cold) or a ringed hand (a vampire, lips still wrenched apart in a shout of terror) or a head of dark, spiked hair (a werewolf, partially shifted and burned) and thought it was Magnus?

How many times had he felt the now awfully familiar rush of terror and pain, only for it to be swallowed by relief and guilt?

But as he drew closer, he saw the man’s face. The still, outstretched hand, ringed fingers limp and spread open. The parted, cold lips.

It was Magnus. Magnus, collapsed on the ground, crumpled in on himself and still, so still, and so cold.

He was too late.

“No…” Alec choked out. He fell to his knees beside the fallen warlock, face a mask of horror and fear and desperation.

Magnus’s—Magnus’s cor—his bo— _Magnus._ Magnus was just lying there. His beautiful golden eyes closed, almost as if he were sleeping.

If it weren’t for the way his skin was so pale and his body unnaturally still and his gorgeous features slack and pale, barely any trace of the agony he must've felt left, maybe he could have been.

Alec leaned forward, fingertips brushing his cold, cold face.

No response.

No soft and sleepy smile, no golden eyes fluttering open, no faint stirring and a hum in his chest.

Just stillness. Quiet.

Alec’s hands drew back like he’d been burned, curling in on himself, clutching lightly at his chest. His heart felt like it was ripping in half, like it was burning out of his chest.

And then Alec screamed, shattering the silence.

It was an awful, horrible, and heartbroken sound.

Tears were streaming down his face, his eyes burned and vision blurred but he didn’t care because Magnus was… he was…

He reached out with a trembling hand to touch his cool skin. “No… _no,_ no, _please no…_ ”

He hesitantly, sorrowfully lay his hand on Magnus’s face as if afraid he’d disintegrate under the touch.

Magnus wasn’t moving.

 

Not too far away, Jace, Izzy, and Clary had gone looking for him.

And Jace stumbled as if he’d been punched in the gut.

A wave of grief and pain like he’d never felt before slammed into him, awful and powerful and suffocating. His bond was screaming out in pain, burning.

“Jace, are you alright?” He heard someone asking.

“…Alec,” he gasped out. He’d never felt something like this from Alec before. He always kept the bond muted, making sure Jace didn’t feel anything too personal.

And Jace had a hard enough time reading anything on the bond anyway, with how thin it was.

But this? Alec wasn’t holding back. He was unhinged. He didn’t care about anything but whatever was causing this horrible feeling.

And the muted feeling didn’t matter when the message being broadcast was so horribly, awfully loud.

And a hallway or two away, someone screamed.

They looked up. It was an awful scream, full of grief and rage and pain.

They exchanged a look before sprinting down the hallway, Jace running after them only a beat slower.

Clary was in the lead, and when she rounded the corner, she was met with a heartbreaking sight.

Alec was on his knees by a body, face twisted into a look of pure pain. Tears were streaming down his face, his eyes were red-rimmed and puffy, his cheeks flushed, his entire body shaking.

“No,” he whispering under his breath, over and over. _“No._ No, please, no, _Magnus…_ ”

Clary had never seen him like this before. He was always so stoic, so strong and steadfast, so held-together. But now the shadowhunter looked utterly _broken,_ awfully young and horrified. He was radiating grief and anger and sadness and pain.

He was reaching for the still body- Magnus, it had to be—and scooping him up, lifting his unmoving… his unmoving corpse. “ _Magnus,_ ” he sobbed quietly. “Please…”

Magnus had been in the Institute when the sword as activated.

Magnus was dead.

Clary felt cold. “I’ll… I’ll go get help,” she stuttered out, and she turned and ran.

 

 

Jace felt like someone had carved out his heart.

He knew most of it was coming from Alec, but he also knew that much of the pain was his own. A cold, deep well of guilt had sprung up in his chest, making him feel hollow and chilled.

He’d done this. He’d killed the love of Alec’s life. He’d murdered his brother’s boyfriend.

“Alec…” he whispered, barely able to bring his voice to audible level. “I’m… I’m so sorry.” His voice cracked.

Alec didn’t even seem to hear him.

He choked out a sob, squeezing his eyes shut. He clutched Magnus’s body to his chest, rocking back and forth, quietly sobbing Magnus’s name and pleas for this to be a dream.

Magnus was still and silent in his arms, his slack face pale and expressionless. His eyes were closed as if he was asleep. His body was motionless and limp.

Alec screamed again, crying and holding him closer to his chest. “ _Magnus,_ ” he sobbed. “Magnus, please… please, come back… Please, you can’t be gone, I love you…”

It’s a horrible, heartbreaking sight. Alec was hugging the dead warlock close, refusing to accept the love of his life was gone.

He was still warm. Not as warm as he should be, but… it almost felt like he was still there. Alec let out another soft sob, his cries dying down to small, whimpering sobs.

“Alec…” Isabelle said softly, sounding heartbroken but resolute. “Alec, he’s gone.”

“No, no, no,” Alec mumbled under his breath, more tears leaking from his eyes. “He’s not… he’s can’t be…”

Isabelle stepped forward, putting a hand on his shoulder. “Alec,” she said gently.

He shook her off, shaking his head desperately, denying it. “No, _no…_ ”

“Alec, you can’t… he’s gone, brother. I’m sorry,” Jace said, voice weak.

“We gotta… Alec, we gotta call Catarina. We gotta take him to the morgue.”

They’d been taking the fallen to the Institute’s morgue to make burial preparations and contact next-of-kin. The main hall was for… was for _dead people._ It wasn’t for Magnus. Magnus was endless and beautiful and _alive._ He didn’t belong in a fucking morgue.

“No,” he said, voice firmer than it had been for hours. “ _No,_ you can’t…”

He had to be okay. He had to be.

They tried to pull him away from Magnus’s body, and he fought them away.

“He’s _dead,_ Alec!” Isabelle cried. “He’s gone, and I’m sorry, but he’s _gone.”_

Alec wouldn’t stop shaking his head, rocking back and forth as he held him close. “No, I…”

He stopped.

Through the hopelessness and despair of the black hole in his chest, he felt something.

Magnus… Magnus shifted. Just slightly. He moved. He _moved._

Alec’s eyes widened, and he laughed. High-pitched and desperate and watery, but he laughed. He laughed hysterically, tearfully.

The others reacted with understandable alarm.

“He’s alive,” Alec sobbed, pressing a shaky kiss to Magnus’s slightly parted lips. He was grinning so widely that his face hurt, his chest bright and hot.

Isabelle and Jace watched in horror as their brother clutched his dead boyfriend close, insisting that he was alive. “He’s okay, it’s okay,” Alec said, voice tearful, “It’s all gonna be okay…”

 

They tried to drag him off again, trying to pry him away from the body. “No, let me take his pulse, he’s _alive,_ ” he insisted, but they managed to pull him away with their combined effort.

“No!” Alec cried, and Magnus slipped from his arms and crashing to the floor.

Alec struggled, kicking and screaming, and then—

Magnus _stirred_ on the ground, a soft moan of pain slipping from his lips. And this time _everyone_ saw, everyone heard-

Alec breaks free in their shock, and instantly threw his arms around Magnus, crying tears of relief and joy. “ _Magnus,”_ he practically shouted, flinging himself to the floor at the warlock’s side and pulling him gently into his arms. “ _Magnus…_ ”

 

Jace didn’t even realize how badly he’d been suffocating under the pain and grief radiating through the bond until it was gone, replaced by pure exhilaration and thrilled joy, relief burning bright and hot in his chest.

Magnus was… was _alive._

Magnus, exhausted and confused, sagged into Alec’s arms, eyes blinking hazily. “Ale…alexander?” he rasped, throat sore and burning. “What’s… what’s going on? Is Madzie okay?”

All Alec could do was sob into his shoulder, clutching at him desperately. “I’m so sorry,” he whispered. “I was angry and I didn’t mean any of it and I love you, I love you so much. I thought I’d lost you and you’re everything to me, please, I love you…”

Magnus hugged him back, even though he was tired and confused. His limbs felt heavy and his whole body felt weak and cold, but he still tried his best to wrap his arms around Alec comfortingly.

The words registered a little late. _I love you._

Magnus’s eyes widened.

Alec… loved him?

“I love you, too,” he said softly. It was sincere: he loved Alec more than anything. But he hadn’t Alec felt the same, not yet. He’d hoped maybe one day he would, but he wasn’t holding his breath.

Alec only squeezed him tighter, clutching him as close as he could. “I love you so much,” he mumbled brokenly. “I’m so sorry, I love you…”

Magnus relaxed into him, snuggling slightly into his embrace. He still felt weak, and Alec’s strong arms around him and warm, broad chest were comforting and a good support.

That’s how Clary and the others found them: Magnus slumped in Alec’s arms, nuzzling against his chest, and Alec clutching him close with silent tears running down his face.

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> jingle bells, jingle bells / valentine is a dick  
> so alec cries / magnus almost dies  
> the author is a prick / hey!
> 
>  
> 
> how did magnus survive? angel blood. he's technically half angel. but since it's fallen angel the sword burned like hell, but it didn't like, kill him. look don't pick apart my logic i just wanted some angst  
> also madzie goes to her New Mom catarina and we stan
> 
> might write an epilogue but y'all know how i go. probably won't. but this did end very abrupt so.


End file.
